Saturday, November 3, 2007

Questions, Lots of Questions Part 4

Part 1

One way the cult offenders can keep their victims trapped and doing their bidding is by convincing a personality that she/he is as bad as their abusers. There are many ways that set a victim up to believe this.

The most powerful is to make a child believe they have participated in something when in fact the 'deed' was done before the child ever arrived. Or a child might be co-erced to do something that they would never do without extreme duress. Victims don't give themselves the benefit of the doubt, they easily take on responsibility for things they shouldn't. That is one of the hallmarks of victim behavior.

The alter ends up believing that she/he is indeed evil and discontinues fighting against the programming. The alter is hopelessly caught in ."if you can't beat them, join them" thinking. It seems better to participate than to be continually tortured. Small children and life-long victims are easily tricked and trapped.

As an adult viewing that child's graphic memory of such events, it was easy for me to see that these instances were nothing more than set-ups. Because parts of me already had the benefit of sorting through our victim behavior, we could easily spot the games and assign responsibility to the offenders where it belong.
But bear in mind that was not the case for me before therapy. I never could have sorted those memories. I would have easily fallen victim to my internal enforcers. I had literally no skills to protect me against such manipulations.

I wish I could say that this behavior will be stopped sometime soon. But since it's rarely even talked about anymore, I don't think there's much chance of that. Back in the late 70s and early 80s when childhood abuse was really coming out of the closet, it seemed to be a normal progression to discover victims like me discovering deeper darker secrets.

The talk shows and magazines picked up those stories right along in that progression but just like the offenders of incest and child rape were screaming loudly that they were wrongly accused, so did the offenders in the darker arts of perversion. Organizations like VOCAL and FACT sprang up in the name of "the falsely accused."

The result was to quiet the victims by taking away their voice. All of the victims lost valuable ground in the fight to educate the public. But particularly the victims of ritualistic abuse and satanism lost huge in the credibility department. It was much easier to believe that someone made it up, than it could possibly be real.

False accusations became a battle cry against those speaking out against abuse. Motives were everything from ex-partners getting even to professionals grasping for glory. Even the famous McMartin Day Care case got thrown off balance by the allegation that memories were planted by unscrupulous professionals. Questioning of those children was so mishandled no one will ever know the truth. So instead of seeing it as the confusing mess it became, it's been written off as more proof that this kind of stuff doesn't really happen.

False memory syndrome became the catch phrase of the day (and still is) to dismiss any and all allegations. Those accused actually began to receive more airtime and press than victims. The result was that ritualistic abuse and satanism were swept back under the rug.

As long as they stay there, those individuals who engage in such activity will continue to do what they do. There can be no protection for children when no one will believe.

I'm not going to pretend that sometimes evil people do not accuse some one of abuse to further their own purposes. Nor am I going to profess that there is no way a therapist would plant ideas into client's heads. I, for one, know what human beings are capable of. As easily as adults can rape children, others can accuse when no abuse is there and therapists are not exempt from being evil.

However, to throw out all abuse as unreal is just wrong. The world is just not that black and white. I believe that most reported cases of child abuse are accurate. The courts have seen all too many cases where children have been abused only to have the court case turn into mom versus dad in the divorce as motive for the child not to be believed.

Juries have let offenders off saying in one breath they believed the child and in the next the prosecution didn't make their case while multiple victims (of which the jury only new of one) sat in the court room awaiting a verdict. For me how does that even make sense. If the jury believed the child, isn't that the case.

But manipulation is the name of the game in our court system and every where else along the way in our country. And who are the experts of manipulation? Well, the answer to that question, the offenders, of course.

Since confusion is the fodder upon which offenders feed, the way to combat them is to be informed.We, as a society, need to wise up and wade through all of the crap to figure out who is really who and what is really what. Until we can do that, there will be no protection for children of abuse, all forms of abuse.


Cheesemeister said...

This seems to happen to most people who suffer from DID. I don't myself (I have bipolar disorder, another joy in life) but I have been drawn to a lot of people that have DID. We on the outside don't see anything evil in any of you, but there is always an alter who believes him/herself to be evil. I suppose in people who have been abused but whose personalities don't fracture they end up either carrying out abuse themselves or believing themselves to be worthless. I'm appalled by the evil that human beings are capable of inflicting on helpless children.

Cheesemeister said...

I think the issue of repressed memories can be very complicated. I had a lot of them. I still don't consciously remember the details of what happened to me but I've been able to put it together so it makes sense. It was not ritual abuse, it was regular old sexual abuse. The perp figured I was too young to tell anybody.
However, many years later while undergoing hypnosis, the hypnotherapist tried to convince me that my father was the perp, and he was not. I've always locked horns with my father, but he is quite simply not a child molester. I was very angry with this woman for trying to put this idea in my head. I actually ended up figuring out on my own who it was. And it made sense when I did.

jumpinginpuddles said...

its really heartbreakign to hear our alters say oh we deserved it its our fault and give a myriad of reasons why it is. From day dot they have always felt responsible if soemthing goes wrong even now to one of our friends instead of just chance it must be them becasue they are so bad they touched them, when in fact life touches everyone but these guys believe with all their heart it is their fault, the sad fact is they have bene brainwashed into believing it is.

Janet said...

jvplanet here.

I have been doing a great deal of research on the did phenomenon.

I was kept and gang raped by 6 men on halloween night in 1966.

My mother was kept drugged in another room.

I wonder if anyone else had this experience.

I was also abused by both parents from the age of 4.

My 7 other siblings said nothing and never tried to fight back.

My biggest problem was not so much my mother ignoring what was going on, as it was my siblings later in life letting me go nuts before they would admit the problems from our past.

My mother tried desperately to fix me after the gang rape. But, she did not allow the school to send me to a psych when I needed it.

Instead, she gave me a recipe to kill myself at age 11.

Obviously i'm still alive.

I have been following your blog.

I got a little scared when people talk about ritual abuse.

The six men who raped me and my mother were not satanist. They were Irish Mobsters in business suits.

I ran away when I was 14. I had syphylis and gonnerea at the same time. I ran to Washington DC.

When I came back from Washington to Harvard Square I became a courier for government issued LSD. I handed it out like ice cream in Cambridge, MA

I did a lot of acid in the 60's.

The acid didn't hurt me. The incest and gang rape did.

I've been in therapy for almost 30 years. I had to put my kids in foster care in my 30;'s They were only age 10 and 12.

Today I have a great deal of support from the DMH and social workers.

I am much higher functioning than my DMH peers. But I still suffer from DID and PTSD.

My kids turned out great. I even raised a dozen or so "street kids" Much like myself.

I am able to understand love though at one time in my teens I was an active Satanist. I love very much and am very close to God.

I am considered a Shaman in my area. A wounded healer if you will. People count on me for what I know, and I count on them for love.

This is a symbionic relationship with my environment and the people in it.

I have a strong link to God and I have enjoyed this relationship since before the abuse beginning at age 4.

If it had not been the grace of God, I would have died a junkie, prostitute by the time I was in my 20's.

I'm not sure who will read this, but my main point is that no matter how bad a childhood we have, we can choose to rise above it.

My struggle is my joy.

Good Luck, and God Bless,