Yesterday I saw a brief snippet of a tv show with a relatively young woman stating she was a "the glass is half empty" kind of person. The woman further stated she just couldn't help it. That was just her and there was nothing she could do about it.
I remember thinking as I heard those words how stuck this woman was. I know from personal experience it is the perspective that keeps us stuck. We are only stuck because we chose to be. If we decide we want to find a way out, we indeed can.
I know this because I used to be a "the glass is half empty" kind of person. Back before therapy I couldn't see the other side of that either. Life was tough and it felt to me like it was always trying to beat me down. For the life of me I couldn't see there was another side to it. I believed just like this woman and I was stuck because of it.
I probably would have been really pissed off had someone tried to tell me I could be a " half full" kind of person only if I tried. I remember vividly believing there were no other choices for me.
It was only after intensive work that I was able to see there really was another side to this coin. Ever since that discovery there has been no looking back for me. I will never again saddle myself with the burden of "no choice" knowing how destructive that belief can be.
If I had to pick one thing in my process that was the most important to me, it would probably be learning I ALWAYS have a choice. I may not like the choices available to me and maybe not even one of them is what someone would consider a "good" choice, but being able to see that I have choices in any and all circumstances has liberated me. It has taken me from the negative world of the half empty glass to the positive one of the half full one because it IS a choice to see the glass as half empty or half full.
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6 comments:
Good Work! and it is work.
It is a great lot of work, but well worth the sweat. Journey on.
Well said. It is nice to have choices.
and I like that the glass is half FULL, cause it means there is still another half to FILL UP with wonderful things.
but sometimes, when I am really low, it seems only 1/2 empty.
and I NEVER want it to be completely empty eh
There you are right, there is always an alternative.
Thank you so much for your honesty in sharing this, RR. I have been through a very similar process. What valuable insights to share for THE BLOG CARNIVAL AGAINST CHILD ABUSE which is now up at my blog. Thanks so much for participating this month!
Realizing that I had choices and didn't have to fear making choices was one of the most freeing times of my life. It can be the difference between being a victim and being a survivor. As a victim, I didn't know that I had choices. My abusers told me that I didn't. Today I know differently.
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