Monday, December 29, 2008

Crusader

I'm a crusader. I've been that all my life. Give me a cause to fight for and I'll
jump right in clear up to my neck. Now the cause has to be something to do with someone being a victim certainly, that is a given. I hate bullies and I clearly love the chance to put them in their place.

This has given me lots of opportunities over the years for positive ways to use my anger at being a victim myself. I've still got lots of stored up anger so there's plenty left for me to get off and going for another cause.

I remember as a teenager a new friend claiming abuse. I helped her run away from home. She hide our for maybe a couple of weeks before she finally got tired and went home. In the meantime I brought her food and things to do as well as keeping her company.

I never really did know "what" was happening to this friend. I just took her word for it. Guess in those days I couldn't handle the details but I wanted to help anyway.

These days I know more and can handle more. I get immersed in the details as well. Looking for ways to find solutions so that victims don't end up "going back" like my friend did. I'll always wonder what happened to her.

Currently, I'm in up to my eyeballs on a case of horse abuse. It's not about the original abusers but a horse rescue organization that is really exploiting horses in dire need for their own purposes. I suspect as I dig through this mess, I may find myself involved in even changing legislation.

While it takes a lot of energy, and most of the time I don't feel I have enough of that, it still helps me to feel powerful in a world that used to overwhelm me. It also helps me to turn than anger into something positive. I find as I do these things, I seem to "use" that anger up. Maybe someday I'll have worked on enough causes the anger will all be gone. That's a day I look forward to............in the meantime, I'll just keep working on causes.

8 comments:

Vague said...

hmm... food for much thought... thanks. :)

Lady Of Chaos said...

I'm not so sure that the anger will ever go away. There are some things in this world that make me extremely angry, even if I'm in a great mood with no anger until I hear of them.

Somethings cause anger no matter what else is happening.

It's what you do with that anger that matters most. If that anger fuels you on to making changes for the good, what's wrong with that.

*I understand that your anger doesn't necessarily come from what you hear is going on, but from what has already gone on in your life. I just can't completely understand it all, so I'm just looking at this from my own experiences.

Rising Rainbow said...

Vague, I hope that's a good thing.

LOC, yes, I'm not complaining about the anger or my use of it. I think it's a good thing to direct it towards something useful. I also think it's a good thing that I have it to direct sometimes.

I know that swallowing it down wasn't good for me. I ended up extremely depressed when I did that instead of acknowledging it.

For me, I may not have been able to protect myself as a child but I can sure do what I can to protect myself and others now. And mostly that anger is what helps me do that.

Ethereal Highway said...

What a great post, RR. I couldn't agree with you more. This is why it is so iritating when people encourage others to pretend that they are not angry because anger is *impolite*. They don't get it that they are telling that person to store it up and let it boil over. I guess some people will do anything to be polite or *acceptable*. I think when we have to choose between polite and honest, honest is better for the soul. If there is anger, then there just is. Good for you for using it. I have also had some anger 'burned up' that way.

JKB said...

Mikaela, I think this is a very very good thing. Have you considered giving some of the information to Fugly? She has many many people that are willing to write letters of protest to county governments, senators, etc., and has been influential in getting things done.

Seeing a horse that was abusedjust kills me. I'm reading your other blog for details, and hope you're dealing okay with the situation.

Kahless said...

I had to run away from your posts on your other blog when you gave a warning about some photo's. Funny, cant handle animal suffering. Please post a warning if you are going to talk about it here. I cant read other peoples comments just in case they are mentioning anything about the horses suffering.


I admire you for your crusading. Mrs K is like that.

Enola said...

Good luck! I'm glad you have found a positive outlet for your anger

Rising Rainbow said...

I'm with you, Lynn, denying anger is NOT a good thing. We all have it, finding something useful to do with it is what counts.

JKB, I don't know about FUGLY, they go off the deep end, I think. Too much attacking and not enough common sense. While I would love to get some political juice turned up, I'd like it to be on target. If you check out the post I'm doing tonight, you'll get my gist.

Kahless, no, there are no comments about the horses suffering here and I'm not going to post details here either. So you are safe, my friend.